every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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