sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
