At least make sure they are 18
Why
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
