my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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