Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Randomize
