what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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