i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
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It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
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He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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