We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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