Heybabeimwearingurpanties
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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