If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize