That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
We are all done wearing pants today
Randomize
