Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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