I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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