So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
