Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
