You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
