just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
