Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
No subtext here. People are naked.
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Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
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Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize