glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
