Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.

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(407): View more from Florida

She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?

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(636): View more from Missouri

i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend

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(970): View more from Colorado

We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later

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(714): View more from California

I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in

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(703): View more from Virginia

I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.

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(719): View more from Colorado

If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?

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