Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
