it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize