these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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