Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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