Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
