He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
