Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize