He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
