So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
