Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
