Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize