Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
