the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
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I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
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We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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