The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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