are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize