Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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