all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
