Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
