dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
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I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
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I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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