My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
