I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Quick, to the slutcave!
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
