Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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