she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize