No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
