im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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