Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'm both gender and math confused
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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