the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
