And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
