You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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