9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
