Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Randomize
